Cast: A boy [B] and a girl [G]. They are besotted with each other.
G. Darling, that was a wonderful evening tonight. The meal, the film, your money – everything was perfect.
B. It was, wasn’t it sugarpie?
G. Yes, honeybun, it was, it was.
B. You know how I feel about you don’t you, sugarlump?
G. Well… I think so…
(He produces a bunch of flowers)
G. Ohhh… (She takes them and reads the tag) But you…
B. (Interrupting her) No. No. Sweet thing, you don’t need to say anything… (He produces a huge box of chocolates) These are for you.
(She takes these and reads the card with them)
G. But darling…
B. No, no – not yet, lovely-face.
(He pulls out a huge valentine’s card. She reads this)
B. Now do you understand the way I feel about you, lemonpie?
G. Well… I think so… but, darling?
B. Yes, my dearest snowdrop?
G. (Her voice changes) My name’s not Sandra! (Waving the cards)
B. What! Ah! Isn’t it? (Pulls out an address book) But what’s in a name, sugarpuff?
G. EVERYTHING, manure face! (She shoves the presents at him) So eat that!
(They leave, in different directions)