Monday Rewrite: The Street Party

Merchant. Where is it?
Woman. Where’s what?
Merchant. You know, the party.
Woman. What party?
Merchant. The street party.
Woman. Well, there’s bit of a fuss going on over there, near the Temple.
Merchant. That’ll be it! I got word there was a load of folks drinking in the street. I figured they might well need a few more bottles. You know, with the festival on. Good for business. And with this amount of folks – it’s be very good indeed for business. (Rubs his finger and thumb together)
Woman. Whose business?
Merchant. Mine! Where are they again?
Woman. There. (She points)
Merchant. Brilliant. I can hear the shekels tumbling already.
Woman. Bit early in the day, don’t you think? For drinking.
Merchant. Not for me. Any time’s a good time to sell a few bottles. And with this many customers I’ll be able to take the rest of the week off! Look at the numbers. Kerching! (Rubs his hands) Right let’s get over there and… oh no!
Woman. What?
Merchant. It’s them again. That lot!
Woman. Who?
Merchant. The bunch who ruined that wedding.
Woman. Well, they look like they’re having a good time, I’d get over there while the going’s good.
Merchant. No point. And just when I thought my ship was in.
Woman. What are you talking about?
Merchant. That wedding at Cana! Did you not hear? Massive do, ran out of wine. So I zoomed over there, thought I’d be quids in. Embarrassed groom would have to go spending a sweet penny or two to get out of a tight corner. What do I find? That lot over there swigging the best wine imaginable. Apparently there’d been some kind of ‘miracle’. (Uses his fingers to make speech marks)
Woman. Oh I heard about that. Jesus of Nazareth wasn’t it?
Merchant. All I know is – a huge business opportunity gone to waste. And now they’re at it again. Look at everybody, they’ve clearly all been drinking that good wine again.
Woman. No I don’t think so. I haven’t seen any drinking going on.
Merchant. So why do they all look so happy?
Woman. Better go and see. Maybe it’s that Jesus of Nazareth working miracles again.
Merchant. I don’t know, I can’t see him anywhere… whoa! (Puts a hand on his chest) Did you feel that?
Woman. Feel what?
Merchant. (Gasps) There it is again. Boy! That was powerful! Something’s going on here. Did you not feel it? Come one let’s go and find out what this is about.
Woman. I’m not sure. I don’t feel anything. You go ahead. I’ll wait.
Merchant. Whoa! There it is again. I’m going in. I need to find out what’s happening here…
Woman, (calling after him) Shall I put in a good word for that wine of yours, if I get the chance?
Merchant. Huh, don’t bother, I’m having whatever they’re drinking.

Based on Acts chapter 2

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